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The economy has been a hot topic for almost two years – it’s all that’s talked about.  How many people are still without jobs?  Are we in a recession?  Is this the beginning of a depression?  Is there a silver lining in the immediate future?  Hell if I know, but with it being July and hotter than the hinges on hell’s door, I thought a listastic top 10 of how to stay cool while be frugal would be a good idea.

Just don’t blame me if any of these backfire.  That’s the point of free will; you can do as you please.

1. Eat Popsicles

Pro: Yummy and generally inexpensive.

Con: Depending on consumption, a bath may be necessary.

2. Ride A Bike

Pro: Wind in your hair.  And you’re exercising.

Con: You’re exercising.

3. Swimming Pool

Pro: Floating on an immediate cooling source.

Con: Jumping your neighbor’s fence.

4. Lake Living

Pro: Again, immediate cooling source.

Con: Your cooling source is also your bathroom.

5. Sit In The Dark

Pro: It’s cooler.  And you can practice nocturnal living in the the off chance you fall in love with a vampire before he eats your face.

Con: You’re in the dark.  Oh, and you look stupid.

6. Go To Work

Pro: Free air-conditioning.  Free interweb.  Actually, they’re paying you to enjoy it.

Con: This doesn’t apply if you work outside.

7. Umbrella Shade

Pro: No direct sunlight.  Use less sunscreen.

Con: You still sweat.

8. Wear Less Clothing

Pro: You get to be naked.  Or close to it.

Con: People pointing and laughing.  And that possible arrest.

9. Travel North

Pro: Expected cooler weather with much less humidity.

Con: Everyone ends their sentences with “eh”.

10. Palm Leaf

Pro: Light breeze made by the hand of someone else.

Con: I see no con.  As long as pay is negotiable.

PodMate has a big announcement…

and is hosting a giveaway.

You should go.  Now.

What the hell are you waiting for?

>Click Here<

The interweb at work has been down for hours.  And while I’m OK with not being able to check e-mail, it has been a gut-wrenching day.  Only because I didn’t choose to be without the internet.  I was forced.  By some invisible force field.  I felt abandoned.  And alone.  And bugged the hell out of PodMate for at least 2 hours.

So I need a pick-me-up.

And what better answer than Bat Dog.

Nana-nana-nana-nana-nana-nana-nana-nana… BAT DOG!

Not really.  But I’m seriously considering since I got the most awesome pair of shades ever.  By the way, I’m happy to have stuck that song in your head – it’s been in mine for a little over a day now.

I wear my sunglasses at night
so I can
so I can
watch you weave then breath your story lines.

Yep.  You’re welcome.

Anywho, the hubs teased me.  Because my awesome new rockin’ shades are aviators.  They’re classic.  And while I was on the fence about my new beloved Ray-Bans, I ignored the cons and went for it.  They have since become my favorite purchase this summer.  Right up there with my bermuda shorts.

(You have no idea how happy I am that stores make flattering shorts that are longer that 2″ from the crotch.  It’s nice.)

I used to think it took a certain face to pull off the aviator look.  I now realize anyone can pull it off.  They’re actually flattering [if they fit your face].  And this particular pair has the clearest, most crisp glass lenses.  Driving is better.  I know, that sounds weird but I kid you not – driving in these specs is quite cool.

A year or so ago, I purchase some $7 Walmart aviators to complete my Halloween costume (I was Axl Rose).  I liked them.  A lot.  And I’ve been running around in them for a year.  With their flaky gold frames, horribly plastic lenses that fog up at the blink of an eye and crooked nose-pieces.

But these Ray-Bans… they are aviators of the gods.  Never gonna give ‘em up.  Never.

I have no photos to share today.  I took the kahuna for a walk a few times last week but I haven’t had time to even look at the shots I took.  I’ve been enveloped with editing baby photos… so the cuteness factor of Photoshop grew exponentially… but the editing is more time consuming than I originally thought.  Blame it on the rain light – yeah, yeah.  (Confession: Never really liked Milli Vanilli.)  (You won’t find this on my iPod.  Promise.)  (But it sure is fun to say Vanilli.)

But I didn’t want to leave le blog hanging.  I like the sense of accomplishment that comes with writing a daily post Monday through Friday.  (Also known as the sense that makes me feel less like a slacker.)    (Blog vs. Grocery Shopping?  Blog wins!  Yay!)

I heart le blog.  (I also might have drank too much coffee this morning.)  (Trying to keep jazz hands at bay.)  (Jazzy!)

I did want to let you guys know that if something seems a little wonky on le blog, or if shutterboo.com isn’t working (shutterboo.wordpress.com should be in excellent condition), it’s because I’m playing with the Interweb.  I’ve given myself a challenge and with PodMate teaching me her Jedi Knight ways [and a few mind tricks for good measure], I should be able to tackle said challenge in no time.  But until then, things may be closer than they appear.  (Or something like that.)  (And why can’t they just create a mirror that doesn’t need a caveat?)  (For reals, yo.)

But until I have more of my ducks in a row [and I know what the hell I'm doing], I’ll fill you in.  I think you’ll like it.  I hope you like it.  Hell, I hope I like it.  Oooh.  Fingers crossed I don’t blow it.  Jeezohpete… I might be freaking out now.  Damn jazz hands.  Excuse me – I need to let PodMate smack me around a bit.

One more for the road: Vanilli.

Have you seen those questionnaires that require you to shuffle your iPod to answer the questions?  It’s like Mad Libs.  For Millennials.  But it also show cases the music you listen to.

Silly?  Yes.

Interesting?  But of course.

Waste of time?  You betcha.

Am I going to do it?  Hells yes.

Note: I had fun doing this.  And I decided to do it because I was a little bored.  I followed the “rules”; I  selected shuffle and hit next for the next question.  I didn’t even look at the answers until I was done.  I added comments in italics after the fact. And I’d like to state for the record that I’m aware that music library is quite broad.  I like most music that’s out there.  Most.)

1. What do people assume when they first look at me?
Take It Easy – The Eagles  (I got nothing.  At least it’s a classic.)

2. What will be a big challenge in life for me?
Walking on Sunshine – Katrina & The Waves  (This, in and of itself, is a considerable challenge.)

3. Am I a good boyfriend/girlfriend?
Just Dance – Lady Gaga  (Invalid question because 1. I’m a wife and 2. I know I’m good at it.  But I do love Gaga.)

4. Do I have a Secret Admirer?
Love in an Elevator – Aerosmith  (Hmmm… I’m both pleased with the song match up but also disgusted.  Weird.)

5. Will I ever become manically depressed in my life?
Take This Job and Shove It – David Allan Coe  (Sounds like I’m already there.  And everyone needs a little David Allan Coe in their musical repertoire.  Don’t worry, you don’t have to call me darlin’.)

7. Is someone trying to kill me?
If U See Amy – Britney Spears  (Coded message foshizzle.)

8. What am I afraid of?
What’s Your Name? – Lynyrd Skynyrd  (Ha.  This actually made me laugh.)

9. What will I be doing in a few years?
Ramble On – Led Zeppelin  (Sounds about right.)

10. What is some good advice for me?
Still Dirrty – Christina Aguilera  (Um… OK… Uh… I don’t know what to say.)

11. What should I do instead of this quiz?
Crazy – Aerosmith  (Don’t worry.  Been doing crazy for a few years already.)

12. Will you get married?
Glorified G – Pearl Jam  (Again, invalid question.  But I find it funny that Pearl Jam is in my iPod.  I like this song.  But I don’t know their music very well.  Because I think every alternative song from the 90s as a Pearl Jam.  The hubs corrects me, don’t worry.)

13. What is the story of your life?
The Joker – Steve Miller Band  (Quite accurate.  If not making it, the joke was on me.  But I don’t toke.)

14. How can you get ahead in life?
Daydream Interlude (Fantasy) – Mariah Carey  (What a horrible match up.  Daydreaming gets nobody anywhere.  Don’t judge my Mariah song choice.)

15. What is the best thing about your friends?
Adrenaline – Phunk Junkeez  (They are quite the punch… I mean “bunch”.)

16. What song describes you?
Rhymth Is Gonna Get You – Gloria Estafan  (I don’t admire SYTYCD for nothing.)

17. How does the world see you?
Night Time Is the Right Time – Ray Charles  (Me no likey.  However, I couldn’t keep from singing along.)

18. Will you have a happy life?
Signed, Sealed, Delivered – Stevie Wonder  (Guaranteed.  Nice.)

19. How can I make myself happy?
The Humpty Dance – Digital Underground  (Sweet!  It always comes back to human nature, no?)

20. What should you do with your life?
Gotta Be More – Marc Broussard  (No definite answer but something Confucius might say.  If you haven’t heard Marc Broussard, you should.  Both him and Jonny Lang have similar music styles and I love ‘em.)

I actually took the time this morning to upload some old photos from my Paco.  It’s been months since I’ve taken the time to do this.  Which means rediscovering digital images.  Like this one:

This was taken back in March.  The story behind it is that PodMate’s car got into a fight with a unruly storm grate and the grate won.  So while her car was in the shop getting fixed up, I had carpool buddy for a few days.  (Let me just say I love carpool buddies – the idea of not looking like a wacko because I have an actual person to talk to is priceless.)  So we made the adventure to work, heading down Lexington Road where she pointed out the grate in question.  And then we spot a treasure: her hubcap.

We pull a u-ey to go retrieve it [because those molded pieces of plastic aren't exactly cheap to replace].  I pull into the parking lot of Headliners and PodMate jumps out of the car to get the hubcap and take photos of the storm hole (the grate really wasn’t on it which is why the car was in the shop).  So I’m minding my own business, looking around at the surroundings.  And then I see it.  And it just doesn’t fit.  Do you see it?

We’ll put the zoom in play:

Is that a little airplane?  I can’t find any kind of information on it.  I’m not very savvy with the Google.  But there is some kind of little airplane implanted in the hillside behind the distillery.  As most times I visit Headliners is in the dark, I’ve never noticed it.  But now that I know it exists, I want to know why and how.  Even if it’s something as lame as “a toy airplane thrown on the hill to make suckers like you think something profound happened.”

Or we can just start making our own assumptions.  That might be even more fun.

I live in a nice neighborhood.  It’s an older neighborhood with tall, shady trees and modest homes.  Most yards are clipped and pruned to look quite lovely.  Everyone is pleasant.  I like it a lot.  Like I said, it’s nice.

It’s not, however, nice-nice.   By that I mean we don’t have cursive writing on our street signs or matching mailboxes.  We have a neighborhood association but it’s “optional”.  There’s only a couple lots with three-car garages.  You occasionally see a BMW or Mercedes but for the most part Toyotas and Hondas live in the driveways.  It’s a nice neighborhood but it isn’t Malibu, if you get my drift.

So imagine my shock when I saw a bright red Ferrari Testarossa in our neighborhood.

My drive by shooting - this is real life, my friends.

My initial thought was… actually, I don’t think I had an initial thought.  Because it was parked in his front yard.  Not in the driveway – in the yard, on the grass, like Bob Barker was going to walk out the front door and the Ultimate Showcase Showdown would begin.  Thoughts did not appear.  Neither did Bob Barker.

Why does this bother me?  The fact that if he bought that car new, it would cost more than his house doesn’t even boggle my mind that much.    Or the fact that he’s killing his grass, because I understand yard work isn’t for everyone.  But the thing is he doesn’t have a garage.  Yah.

I repeat: HE DOESN’T HAVE A GARAGE!

Go on… you can close your mouth… I know, every time I think about it I lose a brain cell.

This bright red Ferrari – albeit, probably 15 years old – sits on the front lawn in show-car fashion in the sun.  He washes and waxes all the time.  But leaves it in the sun.  When winter started coming around, I was wondering what he was going to cook up – would we see a bright blue tarp covering a bright red Ferrari on dead grass?  Nope.  Instead it moved.  Most likely to wherever he was storing his twin jet-skis because those ended up in his driveway.  Because that makes sense.

How does someone drop the money on a super-fine, super-fast, super-mid-life-crisis bright red Ferrari Testarossa and not have a garage?  Google explains that this car would have probably set him back about $75,000.  That’s a lot of bones.  For a used car.  That was built in the early 1990s.  A garage… about $20,000 for a two-car.  My line of thinking on this is If he can afford a Testarossa, twin jet-skis and that Jaguar that is his “everyday car”, he can afford to build a garage.  He gets no stamp of approval from this gal.

So what brought on this little rant?  I saw the Ferrari yesterday.  In all its bright red gloriousness.  Still parked on the grass.  Like a show-car in the Serengeti because the grass is tall.

And so the cycle repeats.

So I’m catching up on my Google Reader – apparently not checking it for a few days leaves for hours of blog-reading fun.  Anywho, I was reading what Omawarisan had to say over at Blurt and I see that he gave me a little nomination for Kreativ Blogger Award.

I wanted to show him my gratitude with a little shout out.  If you haven’t visited Blurt before, you should.  He’s very wise and very witty and has excellent taste in music… and blogs.  It’s his stories that keep me coming back day after day.  Don’t blame me if you get addicted.

So I spent yesterday at Churchill Downs.  Our local advertising club hosts the event and I got all dolled up to schmooze.  I’m not a good schmoozer but for this kind thing, I’m always game.  Having friendly clients makes this much easier.  And funner.

But I learned a lot about myself yesterday.  Surprising since I’ve been living with me for 28 years already but whatevs.

These guys lost this race.  That’s OK – so did I.

• I know more about horse racing than I originally thought.  All thanks to the repeated guidance of my pal VJ and my father-in-law reminding me the money’s in the jockeys.  So I was able to share my knowledge.  You’re welcome.
• I made $11 yesterday.  Well, my winnings totaled to $36 but then I spent some and all you really need to know is I came out on top.  Not big money but then again I don’t do big wagers.  It’s all about winning.  And waving your money in the air [even if it is just $6.40].
• I get crazy jealous when someone wins and I lose.  I almost want to steal their stubs to cash it in myself.  But this isn’t grade school and that lacks taste or something along those lines.
• I can stand mint juleps.  Not my favorite bourbon drink but old fashions were not available.  Thus, I had a julep.
• It took me no less than three hours to consume my mint julep though.  I had to keep adding ice.  And water.  But I drank it.  All of it.
• I want a horse.  Because I want to stand in the paddock in a fancy dress and fancy hat and watch everyone ooh and ahh over my horse.  And I want to name it Split Decision.  I think I could make a lot of money with a name like that.
• Having Google on your phone makes for a fun day.  I loved being able to say “The power of the internet says…”.
• I hate high-heels more than going to the dentist.  My feet hated me for the better part of the evening.
• I eat and drink like a man.  Bourbon Barrel Ale and a lamb shank the size of my head for dinner.  I felt like a caveman.  Or a viking.  Or a royal Grecian that has every kind of food on the table but chooses the bone-in meat to feast on.  Yes, it was divine.
• If you sit next to JBerry at a dinner function, he will eat off your plate.  Even if clients are present.  I don’t mind it though because I ate off his.  Fair trade.
• Lemon and mint in ice cream together is heaven on Earth.  I’d probably be willing to break the law in exchange for a scoop.
• I have no problem whatsoever putting my spoon [which may or may not have already been in mouth] in another person’s dessert.  None.  Whatsoever.